Life After Work: 25 Thoughts Every Girl Has Before Heading to the Beach

When we're working 9 to 5, 5 days a week, we dream of the weekend and how to spend our life after work. As we approach beach season, the last thing girls think of is the water, sunshine, or sand between their toes. Instead, it’s all about the bathing suit, the sunburn, and the dreaded cardio we needed to have done months before. Guilt sets in from that pizza you housed at 3am last Friday after all of the vodka sodas you felt you needed to have after work. If you're like the modern girl, you're having a hard time balancing between presentations, going to the gym, feeding the dog, and don't even think about dating. If you’re like me, here are 25 thoughts every girl has before they get that bathing suit back on and embrace the ocean waves.

• Do I have a magic bikini that makes my cellulite disappear?
• Is this top “Baywatch” or “Pending wardrobe malfunction?”
• THIS is the time I will tan and not burn if I skip sunblock. TOTALLY different than last summer.
• I should bring Aloe Vera for when I burn myself.
• Why’d I eat that pizza yesterday?
• Where’s the leftover pizza from yesterday?
• We can bring the whole vodka bottle, but I’m just going to have one umbrella drink.
• Where’s my 5th pregame, pre-beach shot?
• I’M GOING TO BE THE FATTEST PERSON ON THE BEACH AND IN THE WORLD.
• Do I still have that one piece from swim team 11 years ago?
• It’s not so bad if I suck I don’t exhale even a little ever at all
• Am I the fat friend?!
• My wavy hair is killing it and will be perfect as long as there is no wind and the humidity never changes.
• I’m not going to be that girl that wears make up to the beach.
• Where’s my sun kissed bronzer pallet?
• I’m going to start that novel that’s been collecting dust on my bookshelf.
• Maybe I should bring 6 tabloids though. Just in case I finish the novel.
• I’ll bring carrots and hummus! Perfect healthy beach snack.
• But also maybe these 6 different types of chips.
• I bet I’ll meet my future husband today.
• Let’s bring a Frisbee! My accuracy has gotten way better.
• Lying in the park is about 6% as much work.
• Finally! I get to wear my oversized hat!
• Finally! I get to wear my oversized sunglasses!
• OH MY GOD I GET TO GO TO THE BEACH.